Thank You

The last eight weeks have been great. I have learned a lot about communication and how to work with others. I appreciate each and everyone of your posts. I think you are an amazing group of educators that all have something wonderful to offer. The most comforting thing about working with you all has been the realization that I am not as crazy as I thought. We have similar communication issues, but as that weeks have progressed, I see how we have all grown. Keep up the good work! Please visit my blog from time to time and offer your suggestions and advise.

Thank you so much for the last eight weeks. It has been a great journey!

Adjourning

I have never been apart of a group that had a formal adjourning process. I have worked on projects with groups and we have debriefed after one project before moving on to the next project. But these groups were not moving to a place where we are not working together anymore. I have always left groups based off of my own merit. It has been hard to make the decision to leave at times but I find that I have to do what’s best for me. Choosing to leave my student ministries group at church was probably the hardest one to leave. I loved working with the high school and middle schoolers. It was fun because I spend most of my days with little children. I left the group because it was taking me away from actually being in church. I spent so much time with the kids that I never got the chance to go into the church and receive a word. Ministry became another job. I loved it but needed to take care of myself. I needed to be in church and could not find the balance between ministry and personal time. 

I think adjourning from groups is important. When I left the student ministries group at church I did so without much of a fuss. Once we broke for the summer vacation, I just never returned. I do not think it will be hard to adjourn from my colleagues in my masters program. Honestly it it hard to build relationships this way. While I love reading my colleagues posts and respect their opinions on the things I post, I don’t think I will miss it once I no longer have to log onto the classroom assignments. 

Adjourning allows groups to see what they have done well and what they can do in the future to better themselves. This is something that I do while debriefing with my student ministries group. We always allowed these meetings to help make us better. 

3R's

We have recently lost one of our to teachers due to a family emergency. I was confident that her classroom was being ran properly. Her student are always on task, their academic abilities are much higher than the average 3-4 year old, and she was always looking for new ways to encourage their development. When I put a new teacher in her room to work alongside her partner, my assumption was that this teacher will fit right in. Her teaching style was very similar to the one that had just left. I was sadly mistaken. This teacher was not running the classroom correctly, the teacher that left was not following the curriculum properly, her students showed no knowledge of routine or structure. The teacher that she was partnered with is very passive and did not want to get in trouble for saying something. I had to meet with both the new teacher and the partner to ensure that we could get the classroom on task. While I was extremely frustrated I had to apply the 3 R’s this week. I wanted to make sure I was not rude, since the other teacher was well aware that things were not right. I had to make sure I was not disrespectful and that I listened while we completely restructured their classroom. This was a hard process as I worked with the teachers, but I am confident that after our meeting, we have created a plan that will help our children succeed. 

My communication

I think the assessments I did this week were pretty accurate about who I am and how I communicate. My friend and coworker had very similar views to the assessment scores. I learned that I have major anxiety about public speaking but my peers think that I am a great public speaker. I feel that others can see the nerves all over me, but they both felt that I did such an awesome job. When it comes to aggression I scored moderate, which I feel is right, but my friend thought that this was wrong. She felt that I was aggressive and mean at times and did not show much emotion when it comes to others feelings. While my coworker feels that I am very nice and I do not have any aggression with others. I feel that at work I am much nicer than I am elsewhere. I do not have to have a professional hat on so I do not have as much of a filter at home. Both agreed that I was a great listener. I try my bet to offer myself to others when they need me. I do not mind giving advice when it is requested of me. I am addicted to detail and prefer if things are told to me with all the details but I will just listen without making a big deal about it when I find holes in someones communication. 

This week I learned about self-denigration (O’Hair & Wiemann, 2012). I do this so often when it comes to public speaking. I criticize and attack myself often. I never think I am doing things right, or that my messages are coming across the right way. I want to work on getting over this feeling. I want to be able to be confident when I do anything with public speaking. I also learned that my self-presentation is different  from one social arena to another (O’Hair & Wiemann, 2012). My communication at work is different than it is at home and it is clear to those who are around me. I experienced through this assignment that my friend saw me in a different light than my coworkers did. 

References:

O'Hair, D., & Wiemann, M. (2012). Real communication: An introduction. New York: Bedford/St. Martin's.

Communicating in different groups

I communicate differently with people in different settings. I don’t think it is culturally based, I think it is more relationship based. I talk to my coworkers differently than the way I talk to my family, and my family different than the way I talk to my friends. Each group plays a different role in my life and have to be communicated with differently. If I talked to my coworkers the same way I talk to my friends it would be completely unprofessional. If I talked to my family the way I talked to my coworkers they would think that I am trying to be snobbish or behave like I am better than others. 

My communication with my coworkers is strictly professional. While I like to joke around have fun with my staff, I still draw the line when necessary. I want to ensure that they still respect me as their boss and do not cross over into the friend zone. 

My family is a fun group. My parents are from Jamaica so I often incorporate the accent in my speech when I am communicating with family members. My older family members are very big on respect, so I must remain respectful when addressing them directly. My family is also very honest, which can be considered rude in other arenas. We say things in a very blunt manner, and I would not take that approach with other groups. I would be afraid of hurting others feelings. 

My friends are also a very fun bunch. They are very silly. We tell a lot of jokes, that could also be considered mean, or rude to others. The difference is that this occurs when we are joking. My family is honest all the time, and does not joke about it. My friends are also very community oriented. We are always looking for an opportunity to help others, our conversations often center around the things that are happening locally. 

Nonverbal Communication - Revenge

I watched the first episode of a show called Revenge. This show airs on ABC, but I watched it on Netflix. Based on the way they are communicating while the show is on mute, I can assume that the main character is new to the group. It seems as if there are some people who are skeptical of her and her presence in their social circle. Their nonverbal communication shows by the awkward handshakes, and strange looks. It is also clear that they are unfamiliar with her when they whisper as she walks away.  It is also clear that she knows them from her childhood, but she is up to something. These people have hurt her, but I am not sure how. The main character is out to get some of the people. It is clear that she has a personal vendetta with some characters at first glance. Others become more apparent as the show goes on. Her nonverbal communication shows when she first meets someone. She looks at them in a very serious manner. The show also gives it away when they do flashbacks of her childhood with these people involved. 

My assumptions about the show were all correct. The main character, Emily Thorn is out to get several of the characters in the show. They were involved in killing her father and now she wants revenge. Her real name is Amanda Clark and she has returned to the Hamptons in her fathers honor. The characters who had their reservations about her are correct, even though they do not realize they knew her when she was a child. 

Nonverbal communication is very important, it says a lot about people and how they really feel. I found that I may want to be more careful when meeting new people. I need to pay close attention to their nonverbal cues. 

Great Communicator

Regardless of how some may feel, one of the best communicators I have ever seen is none other than President Barack Obama. President Obama is very charismatic when he speaks. What intrigues me the most about his level of communication is when he is put in difficult situations and he manages to keep his composure and respond appropriately. I can’t image being in a situation where people are constantly asking me questions that are difficult to answer, with no warning. I wish I could be that quick on my feet. So often in directing a child care center parents ask me some very off the wall questions. There are times where a response comes easy and other times where I can’t find the words to respond to their request. If I had the grace and charisma our President has I think I would be a much more effective communicator. While so many don’t care for President Obama and his leadership, one can never deny what a great communicator he is.